The Exasperation Trigger
by Becky99
Summary: Even on Moonbase Alpha, men are from Mars and women are from Venus. J/H


**SPACE: 1999.**  
 **The Exasperation Trigger**

 _(Theme: Even on Moonbase Alpha men are from Mars and women are from Venus)_

* * *

She was angry with him. He did not understand it but the ways of human women – or _any_ women for that matter - had always been one of the mysteries of the universe that eluded John Koenig.

"Can you talk with her?" He had stopped Maya in the hall as she was on her way into Command Center, to start her shift.

"I don't _need_ to talk with her." The Psychon looked a little away from her Commander, recalling something. "We chatted last night and she wanted to assure me that it had nothing to do with my return."

Recently, less than a week ago, Maya had been abducted by the Dorcons who had an unnatural need of her Psychon brainstem. She might have left them for good if it wasn't for John Koenig throwing himself into a carrier-beam. The result: He rescued Maya, Alpha's resident alien, from her kidnappers.

"Why would that have anything to do with why she won't speak with me?"

"Perhaps you need to ask Dr. Russell" Maya said with a knowing smile and a slightly unsympathetic manner. She then gave her Commander a mock-salute and made her way into the Center.

 _Women_ , he thought, _they always stick together._

He was no further along in knowing what was going on now than he was ten minutes before talking with Maya. But at least he did know it had something to do with their encounter with the Dorcons.

He looked for Helena in Medical Center, hoping to catch her when her shift ended but Dr. Vincent told him she had already left. He then walked to her quarters and paused outside the door. John planned on being direct. He had put off any form of confrontation because, frankly, after what had happened with the Dorcons, he was too mentally and physically exhausted to get into any form of quarrel with his lady-love.

And even thinking about that, looking down at the half healed cuts on his hands from the ventilation grill in the Dorcon spaceship, he tried to pin point when something had changed in Helena. She had been so grateful when he and Maya returned, even took him by the arm to lead him to Medical Center to have his hands tended to. They laughed a little, she sprayed an antiseptic then gently wrapped his hands in clean gauze, then he said something …

John said one day they would find a home and he would not have to continue such heroics … It was a jest. He said it as a throwaway and thought she would find it as funny as himself. But suddenly Helena's grew quiet and her expression changed. She finished up with him and told John he could return to Command Center.

And the time, although recognizing a little discomfort, he agreed and told Helena he would see her later. He even started to close the distance between them to give her a quick peck on the cheek. But she was away from him. He shrugged and left Medical Center.

But he knew he was in trouble when in the days that followed Helena went out of her way to avoid him. At first he thought it might be conflicting shifts but when he would call on her she told him she was tired or busy or couldn't be disturbed. It was getting ridiculous.

Then finally yesterday, when he called on her, Helena told him in no uncertain terms that she wanted him to leave her alone. She needed some time to think about their relationship. Stunned, he asked her why and she replied with a cryptic answer:

"A courageous man like yourself, I'm sure, has better things to do." And she blanked the screen.

The only thing he could think of was that she was angry he went after Maya on the Dorcon spaceship but that didn't make sense. Maya was her best friend. Of course she would want her rescued. And, from what Maya just told him, her rescue was not the issue – _or was it?_

The Commander was confused and, as he did with everything when he needed answers, he threw himself into the lion's cage to find out what was going on. He pulled up his comlock, pushed a button and saw Helena's attractive face appear on the screen. "I'm coming in." he said simply and opened the door to her quarters.

This time he was not taking no for an answer.

She was sitting in her lounging area, her boots and belt removed, and seemed to be relaxing with a few medical files on the coffee table before her. "Can I help you?" Helena asked, expression dour as John stood before her.

"Yeah, you can tell me why I'm suddenly some annoying alien rash that you don't want to go near." He said bluntly.

Helena leaned back on the sofa cushion, unsmiling. "You really haven't figured it out."

"Obviously not." He moved further into the area and sat in the arm chair near her sofa. Normally, John would sit right next to Helena but the occasion seemed to call for distance.

Helena sighed, "I suppose you wouldn't." It was said not angrily but in a matter-of-fact way that was part understanding and part exasperation. She said, "I've had to accept a lot of things, John, since we left Earth orbit. I also learned what it is to have a bond with you." She looked up, meeting his eyes, "I _do_ love you but it's a love fraught with more hardship than I think you understand."

Koenig tried to hide the puzzlement on his face but was not successful. He knew it was not all sunshine and roses being his lover. How often did Helena wonder if those around her merely thought their relationship was based on his power and her need to be a part of it? Those closest to them knew better but the others on Alpha probably sniggered to themselves, thinking Dr. Russell was no fool. She latched onto the man in charge, giving him nights of pleasure, much like a high school quarter back and the lead cheerleader were often a campus couple. How could she, the CMO of Medical Center, ever go for anyone lower than the leader of Alpha?

It was not fair but the way his people thought often disappointed their Commander. If they only knew the things he and Helena shared ...

"Spell it out, Helena. What did I do?" His tone was firm.

"It's what you _don't_ do, John. I can't fault you for it, really." Once again she looked away from him, scrutinizing her lap. "You are wired to be a leader but you are not always a responsible companion." She sighed once again, closed her eyes briefly, then looked up at him. "Did you ever once think of how I might have felt when you ran off , threw yourself into that beam, then disappeared before all of our eyes?"

He was silent, trying to think of something to say other than the obvious. He was trying to rescue a friend. Was that such a horrible thing?

"John, it wasn't that long ago that you were lost when we were caught in a space warp. I never thought I'd see you again … Then, before that when that creature took on your image and I realized he wasn't you again – that something had happened to you …"

"I'm not sure I get …" he started.

"John, you cannot keep running off like that! You cannot continue to put yourself in the type of jeopardy where I have to wait and hope you will return to me!"

"Helen, I am the Commander of this base. I have to put myself in harm's way when …"

"But you do not have to do it all of the time!" she suddenly cried, "Remember when you disappeared on Entra and you were reported to be dead? I was in Command Center when Fraiser and Alibe called in and told us you and Blake had died." She gulped, "I nearly died myself at that moment." Her voice faded, recalling. "Alan and Maya had to help me to my quarters."

Thinking deeply, John rested an arm of the rise of his chair and put fingers over his lips. Helena looked so tortured he just was not certain what to say or think. He was who he was and he would have thought she'd grown to understand it. He couldn't keep idle while others put their lives at risk.

And in that instant he understood.

He knew what Helena was saying and that was exactly her point. He did NOT have to go with Blake Main to Entra. He did NOT have to go with Alan to explore that "jewel in space" and he certainly did not have to be with Tony in that Eagle when Alpha was drawn into a wormhole. He had left Alpha without not just its Commander but without his second in Command as well.

When he looked back on it, that was irresponsible. Just as it had been when he insisted on going down to the being "I"'s planet when Tony was scheduled to be there too. If things had not worked out not only would Alpha be without them but Alan too. Then later, Helena and Maya … which was irresponsible of them but … but for a different reason.

It swirled in John Koenig's mind.

On a personal level, he had left Helena during times when she needed him close. She was a brave woman, had tried hard to understand his mindset, but had he considered how she or any woman who was as good as his wife would feel when he felt it necessary to be "out there" at all times?

Yes, he was a man of action but he was also a man of intellect, a Commander who could and should delegate. He had done it in the past but not as often as he should. Perhaps occasionally he did not need to be in a landing party – but actually commanding the moonbase he swore to protect.

"I'm sorry, Helena." He said and got up from the chair. He moved to sit beside her on the sofa and she let him. He noted that her eyes were filled with unshed tears and she sniffed ever so slightly. Gently, he placed an arm around her shoulders. "I'll think of you more often and try hard to keep myself safe."

It sounded silly when he said it like this but, for the moment it was all he could think to say. And it seemed to work.

She leaned into him a little, her temple and his chin intimately connecting. "I know your need to be where everything is happening, John." She said, "I went into our relationship understanding the dangers. But just once in a while please reflect on me, what it could do to the woman you love, if you were to go away and never come back. Can you do that?"

"Yes." He kissed the side of her head, gently. Then, when she pulled back and gave him a tremulous smile, he moved in and kissed her sweetly on the lips.

* * *

A few days later Moonbase Alpha found themselves on the outer edges of a Hyper Nova. They were far enough away to not be in danger but a great deal of scientific data could be gathered if a few brave Alphans were to go out in an Eagle for a week and do an investigation.

John glanced once at Helena at her station in Command Center then sent Maya, Alan and Professor Ming to do the job.

Without looking at him Helena smiled.

* * *

 **THE END**  
 **January 2016**


End file.
